Homily - Oct 24 - "Prayer, Piercing the Cloud"

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Homily Oct 10 - All Is Gift

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Seeking a love that is stronger...

Marriage and Family Reflection #2

Our last reflection hinted at how we can understand the human person and how the question of individual identity leads necessarily to the question of our relation to other persons and beings.  Society, then, would reflect a misunderstanding of the identity of the human person if it based its structures solely around the individual.  Marriage and family are two places in which society may be able to be rebuilt with a more proper understanding of the human person.  As we continue our reflections we will continually need to ask the question of identity and seek to clarify just what it means to be human. 

I would be surprised if there were any marriages that lasted without there being a point (usually after an argument or fight) where the couple said: “Let’s start over.”  This is quite the statement!  Start over, after months and years…really?  Yet the proposition is intuitively understood by the spouse and, perhaps, accepted gladly.  What is going on in this instance?  It seems to me that what is being communicated is not a desire to erase the past, rich or tumultuous as it may be.  Nor does it seem that this is simply an easy way to “resolve” a dispute by forgetting that it actually happened.  Rather it speaks to a radical desire for forgiveness and reconciliation.  In our complex lives, this moment often happens when we finally tire of seeking to pin the blame on one or the other and accept that, at least to some degree, the fault is mine.  For the couple to start over, it seems, is to return to the most basic truths that hold them together.  To start over is to use that foundation of love to overcome the present obstacle.  The result of doing this, in fact, can be not only “starting over,” but a strengthening of the bond which holds the couple together.  This happens because now they know that their love is even stronger than whatever difficulty they just had to endure.  Hence the occasion affords at the same time a “new beginning,” a “reconciliation” (putting things back where they were), and a true growth in the relationship. 

I bring up this example as a way to speak in a broader sense of what I believe must happen in our society if it is to overcome the challenges which face marriage, family, and a proper understanding of human sexuality.  We cannot truly “start over,” just as a couple could not wipe the slate of its history clean.  We have all been deeply affected by the culture around us:  it has shaped our ways of viewing the human person, sexuality, marriage, and family.  Beyond this, we all have personal experiences that affect how we understand these things.  A great process of healing must take place in order to throw out any misconceptions about these realities and return to the basic truths that made them so important to society in the first place.  If we were to find a love that is stronger than all of the challenges experienced in our lives, we could return to our relationships with the hope of healing and even growth.

This “starting over,” as I mentioned before, involves a process of forgiveness.  We are, in one sense, the product of society.  It has shaped us and many of us have taken its values as our own.  Yet, when we discover that the values of the society do not necessarily lead to upholding the dignity of the human person, a conflict can arise within us.  In a sense what influenced our way of thinking in the past must be confronted.  The best way to deal with these inner wounds is to forgive.  It is truly a freeing process to do this.  Who could say: “The world in which I live has not touched me”?  But also, who could admit:  “I have no fault in what I have done”?  Forgiving, you see, is only one side of the coin.  We must also come to take responsibility for our own choices.  Not only have we been shaped by culture, but our decisions also contribute to its formation.  Yes, we must ask for forgiveness, too. 

An encounter that Jesus had with “a sinful woman” in Luke’s Gospel (Lk 7:36-50) can help us grasp how this process can be played out and what can result from it.  The woman enters the Pharisee’s house and begins to bathe Jesus’ feet with her tears and anoint his feet with oil.  Jesus detects the disdain of the Pharisee and tells a parable of two men who were forgiven debts: one of 500 coins and the other 50.  “Which of them will love the creditor more?” Jesus asks.  Then Jesus praises the sinful woman for her act of repentance.  “Her many sins have been forgiven,” he says, “hence she has shown great love.  But the one to whom little is forgiven, loves little.”  Then Jesus turns to the woman and says, “Your faith has saved you; go in peace.”

This event is one that reveals to us a lot about the reality of forgiveness.  First, notice the actions of the sinful woman.  She does not seek to justify her past sins, saying “the economic situation forced me to…” or “I had no other choice.”  She has come to forgive her situation, it seems, and take responsibility for her own choices.  And so she simply weeps and gives all that she has to the One who can save her.  Next we notice Jesus’ willingness and power to forgive, which amaze the hosts of the dinner.  His joy is in her being saved, not in her humiliating act of repentance.  Finally, we are struck by the teaching that the one to whom much is forgiven, loves much. 

We are seeking a love which is stronger than the difficulties we face and the sins we have committed.  Is it not here, in Jesus Christ, that we find that love?  He, by forgiving sins, gives us the power to love.  And hence he gives us the power to “start over,” stronger than ever.  In our marriages and families may we have the courage to take this step in faith, trusting that the Lord can heal our past, strengthen us for today, and shed His light on the future that awaits us in Christ Jesus. 

I encourage you to seek this forgiveness in the Sacrament of Reconciliation.  May you hear the voice of Jesus in the words of absolution, just as he spoke forgiveness to the repentant woman: “God the Father of mercies, through the death and resurrection of his Son has reconciled the world to himself and sent the Holy Spirit among us for the forgiveness of sins; through the ministry of the Church may God give you pardon and peace, and I absolve you from your sins in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.”  The one to whom much is forgiven, loves much. 


Yours in Christ,


Rev. David Carrano


(First written November, 2009).

Homily - Oct 3 - "Habakkuk's Vision"

"How long, O Lord?  I cry for help but you do not listen!" Habakkuk's plea to the Lord prompts God to promise a "vision" which "will not disappoint."  What is that vision?  This homily comments on parts of the whole book of Habakkuk, as Sunday's first reading was Habakkuk 1:2-3; 2:2-4.